Rach

I love dearly every member of my family and my sister Rachael is no exception. Picture a 5-foot tattoo covered, beer loving, Harley Davidson owner. Everyone that meets her instantly loves Rach. I have always been jealous of her for that. We live our lives by a totally different set of rules. She has none and I have many! Loving our family has been about the only thing we have had in common until she knocked on my door one day over 9 years ago to tell me she was pregnant. I remember jumping up and down and squeezing her tight, I was so excited then I saw the look of panic on her face “ I am on my way to tell mum… will you come with me?” She was 23yrs old.

I remember sitting in a room nearby with my brother falling all over ourselves with laughter as she told her. Not nearly as sympathetic as we should be.

                                                   

Madison was born on the 12^th May and it just happened to be Mother’s Day that year.

I was there, down the business end, when she was born. The vision of her face as her head pushed through is as clear in my mind as the Easter egg I ate 5 minutes ago. I often think of this day. The bond I have with my niece is a constant reminder of why I will try everything I possibly can to have a family of my own.

A few years ago Madison and my Mum were accompanying me to an IVF ultrasound and as a curious 6 year old would, she needed to understand what was going on. Now for as long as she has been born Foo and I have been trying to get pregnant. During that time we have endured two ectopic pregnancies, eight surgeries and 19 failed IVF cycles. So we have had a lot of explaining to do to Madison over the years as to why Aunty Ange is sick or sore or in hospital.

“So, Aunty Angie and Nanny how will the Dr help you make a baby?” My first thought was, oh no! How can we fudge this one? She is way too young to understand, it took Foo almost 5 years to work it out. Then with the wisdom of being a mother for 34 years, my Mum explained the process to her in 6-year-old terms. Now, when I ask Madison how we are going to make a baby she says “Aunty Angie has an eggie in her tummy and Uncle Foo has a big Tadpole in his tummy. The doctor makes a little cut in their bellybuttons and takes them out and puts them together in a dish in the hospital. Then when they stick together they put the baby back in Aunty Angie’s tummy, Hopefully it grows but if it doesn’t that just means that the baby was too sick to grow.” She is now a nine year old with a better understanding of how to make babies the infertile way than most adults do.